


Let's Fall In Love

by autumn_soldier



Series: Let's Fall In Love [1]
Category: Marvel, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Angst and Porn, Domesticity, Family, Fluff, High School AU, Hipster!Loki, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, Sibling Incest, Sibling Rivalry, Tattooed!Loki, Thorki - Freeform, astronomer!loki, ballet dancer!loki, favoured brother, happy endings, jock!thor, pierced!loki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-09
Updated: 2015-01-08
Packaged: 2018-02-08 03:36:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1925283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/autumn_soldier/pseuds/autumn_soldier
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki always felt like he didn't quite fit in. This was never helped by his father's unfailing preference towards his half-brother, Thor. Feelings of pain and jealousy and resentment curdle inside him...and something else becomes tangible after the boys come of age. Something hot and sweet makes itself known only when Thor is in the room...and Loki hopes to God it's not what he thinks it is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Let's Fall In Love

**Author's Note:**

  * For [deadgirldancer](https://archiveofourown.org/users/deadgirldancer/gifts).



> So this is an early birthday present for my dear friend Leia, or deadgirldancer ;) <3  
> Thorki isn't a ship that I really ship, but I have a feeling by the end of this I might just start. Let me know what you guys think, and if anyone asks about the title, watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-xmuiQ0Ha4  
> It explains all. It's the reoccurring song of this pairing within this fic. Have fun reading, chapter 2 comes out when I finish it :) 
> 
> ((note: a labret lip piercing is a small stud that sits under the bottom lip.))

_“Some say the world will end in fire some say in ice from what I’ve tasted of desire, I hold with those who favour fire. But if I had to perish twice I think I know enough of hate to say that for destruction ice is also great and would suffice.” ~ ‘Fire and Ice’ - Robert Frost._

Thor Odinson couldn't see him, past or around the hum of the crowd, the over-excited buzz as the entire student body of Norse Washington high flooded out like bees on the last day of the year. Pushing and shoving to get their year-books signed, every now and then some doe-eyed freshman would tug his sleeve, holding out their blank yearbook signing page and an unused pen. But it wasn’t them Thor wanted. And who he wanted, he couldn’t see…

A shoulder knocked into his abs and he grunted, looking over. Jane had managed to almost knock him flat, while running to catch the president of the science club on his way out of the school. She turned distractedly.

“Sorry!”

“It’s fine..hey, have you seen Loki?”

“Recently? yeah, he’s with the astronomy guys.”

Of course. Fucking geeky little brother. Thor thanked her and pushed his way across the crowd, finding himself at the other side with a little less energy and the want to see Loki having gotten stronger without him knowing. It wasn't until about four freshman and a quarterback later that he finally found what he wanted.

Loki was sat on the wall, perched with a skinny knee against his chest and his yearbook, untouched, by his leg, a can of vanilla coke pressed to his lips. He was with one or two guys from his club, and he had the typical bored, dead look that could be found on the face of most young hipsters his age. Whatever, Thor had always liked that. He pulled himself up next to him, dwarfing his little brother and making one or two of the acne-faced club members go a shade or two paler. Thor grinned, trying to help them relax. Most of those types of people were nervous around him...he liked to see the look on their faces when they realised he wasn’t gonna bully them. He liked making friends.

“Hey, guys...Loki, I didn’t catch you at the assembly.”

He could hear Loki’s eyes hit the back of his head as they rolled. “I don’t do assemblies. I was on the bleachers.”

Of course. With his.. Loki pulled out the famous Astronomy book and rested it on his knee, granting the pages more attention than he did his brother or his friends. Lacking interest or enthusiasm for anything that involved people was kind of Loki’s thing.

“Sure...you gonna walk home?”

“Tony said he’d drop me off.”

Thor made a face. “C’mon, dad’s making dinner tonight, he’ll be pissed with you if it gets cold.”

“He’ll find some other reason to be pissed at me.”

...That was probably true. Their father had always had some kind of issue with the second son. Loki and Thor had different mothers, so Loki had lived with his mom until she’d passed away the year before last, the Summer Loki turned fifteen, and Thor turned seventeen. Mr Odinson had taken the boy in, and since then it had been a family of three. Mr Odinson, Thor Odinson, and Loki Jotun. Dysfunctional as a bag of rabid dogs, but they got by.

Loki bit his lip absent-mindedly, and Thor watched as he tongued the piercing there, watching the small bar of metal catch the light on his skin. ...damn, that looked nice. Seeing he needed some way of convincing Loki, Thor grabbed an object of common interest.

“Come home now and goats cheese pizza for dinner tomorrow is on me.”

Loki took a second to pout, and then put his books back in his bag. He had no choice. Swinging it over his shoulder, he waved at his friends and followed Thor. The linebacker grinned and walked out of the school with him, a little bubble of pride happily warming in his stomach. He’d gotten him to come home with him… Pride was just one of the emotions that came from having Loki Jotunheim in his life. Love was another of them.

The walk home was silent mostly on Loki’s side. Thor, as always, tried to keep up conversation, asking about his interests, his hobby’s, his life in general.

_“How’s astronomy club?”_

_“How’s photography going?”_

_“That girl in equestrian studies still bothering you?”_

_“That tattoo still hurting you? need me to pick up painkillers?”_

Loki replied mostly in mono-syllables, only getting interested when he talked about his photography course, and how some kid forgot to check out the rules and regulations and ended up unveiling a naked photo shoot to his tutor for an assignment. He laughed then...and Thor took that as a good sign.

“So your day was good?”

“Yeah. Professor liked my portfolio.”

“The photos of that eclipse last month?”

Loki nodded in confirmation, his cartilage bars and ear stretchers becoming visible past his hair. Loki studied photography, had done since he started school, a couple months after moving in with them. First birthday after moving in, Mr Odin had asked him what he wanted. Kid had looked up, and looked down, and finally asked. “...can I have a camera?” Mr Odin had gotten him the finest one on the market, huge and clunky, with a million different parts and settings and things it could do, and a huge tripod that went with it. After getting it, for the first time ever, Loki had jumped up and thrown his arms around their father. He’d kinda had a passion for it ever since.

They came up outside the house after a while walking, Thor babbling away and Loki’s interrupted silence, every now and then the two of them would share a look, maybe a smile. Thor loved the way he smiled...his teeth never showed, but his labret pushed out and his pretty bottom lip shone...he’d like to explore those lips some time. He was so transfixed by his little brother’s mouth that he walked slap bang into the mailbox, making a number of slightly pained noises as he straightened, Loki laughing so hard he had to bend over. That wasn’t the only time Thor wanted his brother to bend over for him.

Laughing, Thor stood, taking on his linebacker stance, ready to defend his own honour.

“Think that’s funny, kid?”

Loki straightened also, raising himself up. All 6 ft 1 of him. He’d hit a growth spurt when Thor had been at camp last year…

“You bet I do, asshat.”

Thor laughed, running to tackle the skinny kid. “You better hope you can run!”

Loki did something he did not often do. In fact, he did something that was not within Thor’s knowledge that he could do. He _squealed_.

Laughing like hyenas, the boys pounced and jumped and tackled around the front lawn, Loki jumping up on Thor’s shoulders at one point before the football player had time to throw him down and try and pin him. Slippery, the younger boy was all knees and sharp elbows and a wiggling torso rescuing him from trouble. Each and every move was more beautiful than the last...on the round where he had pinned him, on his side where he had gone to feint before he could be tackled… Eventually, Thor managed to get him down, pinned on his back with Thor’s hands solid on his shoulders, keeping him still. Loki’s thin chest was heaving, his forehead shining...his coal black hair splayed out round his head, like a halo for the depressed. His beautiful teeth were showing, his pink tongue in his mouth as he grinned, muscles tense and wiry under gorgeous pale skin. Thor moved forward ever so slightly…

“ **Thor**! Loki!”

Both of the named individuals froze, looking right. White-bearded, eternally frowning Mr Odinson frowned down at them from the Welcome Mat, peering at them through the eye that was not covered with a patch.

Thor scrambled to his feet, lifting up his brother who shoved him away, reaching for his bag and his tripod case. Thor cleared his throat, adam’s apple bobbing. He hadn’t seen them, hadn’t seen them...that missing eye had done him a service.

Loki’s cheeks had reddened somewhat, and he slung his bag over his shoulder, hunching slightly, as he always did in the presence of their father. As opposed to his big brother, who opened up and grinned.

“Hey, dad! We’re on our way!” He bound up the pathway, bag banging on his back. “Come on, Loki!”

Loki hunched, the beautiful curve of those sinful lips gone, as was their shine. “...I’ll come in in a second.”

                                                                                                                             

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

 

 

Dinner, as usual in the Odinson/Jotun household, was a mixed affair. On Thor’s side, he piled his plate like a competitive eater, chomping down chicken and rice and steamed vegetables, all the while not shutting up about football and studies and Jane and some girl in home economics called Sif who was totally cool and had agreed to teach him fencing.

Their father would laugh and listen heartily, taking in every word as if what his favourite son had eaten for lunch was the most riveting thing in the world. On the other side of the table, Loki would push food around on his plate, stripping the fat from his chicken and eating that, leaving the healthy meat, eating a few forkfuls of rice and ignoring his peas entirely, bouncing his knee and letting his mind wander. Thor was the only one who ever noticed.

“...so, how’s photography going, Loki?”

The voice breezed over the youngest son at first, he really didn’t expect anybody but Thor to address him at home, let alone during their evening meal. Thor leaned across the table to softly touch his shoulder.

“Bro..dad’s talking to you”

Loki looked up, frowning. Odin was, indeed, looking at him as if he were expecting an answer. Like a dog trying to run and tripping over it’s own paws in excitement, Loki started speaking.

“I-I, it’s great, Odin, really. I actually submit my portfolio this weekend, gonna see if my tutors and examiners like it enough to be accepted in this local art exhibition.”

Thor’s face lit up. Not only was his brother talking at the dinner table, but there was an exhibition he could go to?!

“Th-that’s awesome! We’ll be right there, won’t we dad?”

Odin nodded sagely. That was his way. “When is it, son?”

“Fifth of March, this Saturday, 4pm.”

Their father took a minute to think, then nodded again. “I can make it. I’ll bring your brother and we’ll be right there for you.”

Loki’s heart sang. “R-really? thanks! that would really mean a-”

Odin’s phone buzzed in his pocket, and he held a hand, palm-out to stop his youngest son’s words in his mouth. It was pretty rude to take a call during dinner by normal people etiquette, but Odin’s job was far too important to allow for breaches of social rules.

“Hello, Lauf? Yes,of course, give me a minute-”

Mr Odinson stood up from the table, brushing the remaining crumbs of food from his beard, nodding to Thor before he leaves the table, patting his shoulder. He all but ignored Loki. As Loki got up and left the table, it left Thor with a frown. The happy little smile that had curled at his lips and pushed out the labret had faded, leaving him expressionless as he usually was. And that was when Thor resolved to make that smile appear, by whatever means necessary.


	2. Runs out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> True love doesn't happen overnight, and real devotion is not born at first glance. Thor fell in love with Loki like a warm, summer rain. Gentle, and sweet, and slow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After the positivity I got from Chapter 1, I thought I'd hurry along the publishing schedule :) This Chapter adds context and backstory to how Thor's love for Loki evolved, and in Chapter 3 we will be moving along with the narrative.  
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0OWj0CiM8WU  
> Thanks for the much-appreciated feedback
> 
> This fic remains a gift for deadgirldancer. Hope you like, sweetie! <3

It had been at least a month after Loki moved in before Thor noticed how he felt towards him. The kid had been all gangly limbs and scabby knees, still in a moody mid-teen phase he had never quite outgrown, spiky black hair and a green hoodie he never took off. Apparently his mom had made it for him.

It also had taken him a while to realise how the dirty hoodie and crappy attitude were just some of his methods to keep himself feeling safe and protected. Loki grudgingly allowed Thor to hand-wash the knitted hoodie after the smell got overpowering, and Thor helpfully explained to him that when Mr Odinson didn’t speak or acknowledge him it was only because that was his way. Not his way around Thor it wasn’t, but for some reason Loki was the exception.

At first, it was like giving a home to a feral cat. Loki wasn’t comfortable sharing a room with Thor, but the space was so limited that there was no alternative, so he slept on the washing machine in the washroom under a mound of bedding, curled up with his knees under his chin and his earphones plugged in, drowning out any noise other than the sound of his thoughts. 

But eventually, and by God it was slow progress, Loki had relaxed. Stopped calling them both ‘Mr Odinson’, coming to terms with the fact that this was not a temporary arrangement. His mom had died pretty recently, and the scars on his mind had not healed..but, for now atleast, they had stopped bleeding.

Thor could probably pinpoint the exact moment he’d realised he felt more than just a brotherly connection. Loki had been sixteen, just past his birthday. There had been a pretty awful summertime thunderstorm outside, and Odin had been out having a dinner meeting with a couple colleagues. Evidently this was not something he could skip or postpone, despite his youngest son being terrified of thunder and lightning. Thor hadn’t been able to find him after dinner, so he’d eventually located him under their father’s bed. As the noise raged from outside, he snuggled himself into a tiny ball and dumped a pile of laundry on top of himself to drown out the noise.

Thor had burrowed himself inside, fully intending to make his little brother better...and then gotten himself stuck. This had been funny enough to do the same job, leaving Loki weakly chuckling, until he allowed himself to be coaxed out into Thor’s bedroom, where he had put headphones in and the two of them had played crash bandicoot til the rainbow came out at 6am the following morning.

Six months later, that had been what inspired Loki’s first tattoo. Lightning bolts, grey and silver like embossed iron decorated his torso and upper arms. Not technically legal, but Odin wouldn’t care. Caring wasn’t their dad’s deal.

That was when Thor knew how he felt. He’d never had a brother before, so he had no idea how he was even _supposed_ to feel towards this bitchy little kid with a hankering for piercings. So he assumed it was normal to every now and again have the urge to kiss those happy lips and burrow his way into those skinny arms and stay there for all eternity. That was...until he had the second hint.

The Summer after that Loki turned seventeen. Two tattoos and a handful of piercings later, it was the second anniversary of him moving in. Odin had encountered a busy Summer, so he tossed a handful of camp brochures at the boys and gave them free reign. Money was never never an object when it came to getting the boys out of his hair. At least, Thor had never read it like that. However, Loki’s keen blue eyes sliced through any kind of pretense or falsehood. It was both beautiful and terrifying. 

Thor had chosen the football camp, it was a surefire way to make him a shoo-in for a scholarship at the college he was looking at. Loki moodily pointed out some Summer school for budding Astronomers. With a raised white brow, Odin had asked him why.

 _“I want to see the stars.”_ He had said.

There. Right there...that _thing_ in his eyes. The deep, faraway look. It had been with him all this time, and it was still a sweet surprise when Thor caught it. Quiet, content...almost wistful. He’d later figured out that his mom had had an interest in star signs and stuff like that...it was his last connection to her.

His birthday gift to him that year had been a stack of Astronomy books on constellations and star gazing that was at least three feet high. It had replaced Loki’s odd, distant expression with one of joy...but that was good, too.

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Summer camp had been and gone, all lost in a haze of lazy evenings that lasted years, hasty makeout sessions in the locker room that tasted of sweat and a little like shame, and meals that were meant to boost muscles, but actually made him feel six months pregnant. Oh, well...that was what he had to get used to if he was gonna be serious with this football thing. He could only hope he was good enough.

And when he got back, what he found was even better than what he’d left. His little brother had filled out over the three months he’d been gone. He was still thin, but wiry, and he’d hit 6 ft at last. Sun had failed to brown him, but it had given his black hair a golden strand here and there, which he hated but Thor just felt it made them look more like brothers. And Thor liked that. He liked that very much.

And, slowly but surely, as he had wanted…

Loki seemed to grow to like it, too.


	3. Tango

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thor is invited out to a bar with friends...but once there, he learns his little brother hasn't been doing so well. And for some reason, it ignites a possessive flame in him, that he has no idea how to snuff out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was hard for me, took me a good five hours, and it's the longest I've written yet. I can only hope it's worthy of everyone's appreciation.  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-gdmXVSgMI - Chapter song. 'El Tango De Roxanne' from Moulin Rouge.

It was a bit of an unpleasant shock to hear his phone in his ear the second he woke up, to say the least. Thor had become a night-owl as of late, staying up to work out and practice, so sleep was his happy place, and he didn’t appreciate it being invaded. He groaned, rolling to pick up the noisy instrument.

“WHAT?!” He snapped loudly.

He heard a muffled curse from the other end of the line, and the hyper-aggressive mutterings of one of his close friends. Shit.

“...sorry, Sif. I was sleeping.”

“ _I gathered that._ ” she answered somewhat grouchily. A low, energetic hum filled his ears from the other end of the line. So...she was out. The possibility of going out, maybe a possible invitation loomed on the edge of his mind, and he tried not to let it make him stutter.

“S-so what can I do for you?” He stammered, inwardly cursing as he swung his legs out of bed, knuckling his eyes.

“ _Thor, do you even know what time it is?_ ”

Thor checked the time on his phone, seeing ‘8’. “8am, why?”

He heard her chuckle, and even though the joke was at his expense, he wanted her to keep going so he could hear her laugh more.

“ _Wrong, big boy. It’s 8pm. I’m with the guys at the bar, you feel like meeting us?_ ”

Shit shit shit. Thor jumped out of bed like there was a fire in there, trying to keep his cool over the phone as he stubbed his toe on the wooden leg of the bed.

“FUCK-yeah, sure, sounds cool, Sif.”

He can hear her eyebrow raising. She did that so well.

“ _Maybe later, linebacker. Meet us at Heimdall’s, half an hour? or do you need time to dress yourself?_ ”

She even sounded hot when she insulted him. That was Thor’s kind of woman.

“...I’ll be there in ten.”

“ _Right_.”

She hung up first, thank god. It would be criminal to hang up on such a voice, and he didn’t want to make it even more awkward between them. Thor cradled his toe...he was sure it was broken, but it was only bruised. He felt the second pair of eyes on him before he looked up from his near-fatal injury.

Loki had clearly not been awake too long, either. He hadn’t bothered to throw on any proper clothes, just an old pair of sweats and a huge T shirt. He cradled a bottle of vanilla coke in his hand. Healthy breakfast, little brother.

“What was that noise, you kill a man while I was sleeping?” He grumbled. N’awww... his hair was all sticking up on end. Must have been a good night, that is, it was a good night if Loki slept at all.

“Hurt my toe - I’m fine, thanks for asking.”

Thor crossed Loki, getting past to grab socks and underwear from the drawer. Loki stood and watched, vaguely amused at Thor’s discomfort.

“Lemme guess. You thought it was morning.”

“No.”

“Quit lying.”

Thor squidged up his face. “Jeez, don’t do that mind-reading thing with me, it’s not cool”

“Do you honestly think a small amount of intelligence and being familiar enough with a person to guess their idiosyncrasies equates to psychic ability?” Loki inquired, frowning.

Thor blinked at him.

“...shut up.” He said after a good thirty seconds, before yanking his shirt off to pull on a fresh one.

“You’re not even gonna shower?”

“Don’t need to, no time anyway.”

Loki’s nose wrinkled.

“You had practise yesterday. You stink.”

“Hey, when has a little man-stink bothered anybody?” Thor grinned, waggling his tongue at his slightly disgusted baby brother. He went to push past him to get to the washroom.

“Oh, it never did. Just connotes that you have nobody to impress.”

 

Thor stopped in his tracks. Loki was right...Sif was frosty with him already, though that was just her way, she was playful like a tigress and that was what he liked about her. But...girls tended to have an issue with guys who reeked like second-hand gym shoes.

He backtracked, grabbing his towel from his room before going for a shower, hearing the sound of Loki’s resounding laughter as he heard him padding downstairs to forage for food. As he stared at his own disgruntled reflection in the mirror, he heard The Arctic Monkeys come on from Loki’s ipod. No doubt the obnoxious kid had it blaring full volume on speakers while he looked for cereal.

 _Little shit of a brother_ , he thought, as he stepped into the shower to wash away the smell of sweat, sleep and a tired indignation, known by one name, and one name only.

Loki Laufey Jotunheim.

                                                                                                                        0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

 

When Thor eventually got to the bar it was at least half past ten. Nevermind, the night was young. He slipped past the couple by the doorway, who were making out as if the apocalypse was on the way. The girl pulled back for a second to wink at Thor, and as the light from the inside hit her face...Thor could see she was no girl.

Thor smiled at the happy couple, nodding and stepping inside.

At their favourite booth in the corner, Fandral and Volstagg already had the night fully underway. Volstagg had a plate of fries and onion rings piled high, and was sharing it with two girls...who he probably thought were interested in him, but Thor didn’t miss one of them slip half the plate into a napkin and put it in her bag. He grinned quietly, and sat opposite.

That soon proved a mistake. Fandral had picked up some friends, too, and the man and the woman on either side of him most certainly hadn’t come there for his food.

“Hey, Thor” The slutty robin-hood look alike greeted him, around the hungry mouth of the cute male bartender. Thor nodded, smirking, eyes searching the darkened place, which was already preparing for the evening. As the natural light lessened, so did the number of underage attendees. He was surprised they weren’t all gone by now, he mused as he swiped Volstagg’s beer and swigged it. The night belonged to them.

“Sif’s not here, incase you were wondering.” Hogun informed him. He hadn’t even noticed the guy was there. He didn’t usually partake in their chosen festivities, usually brought some books with him. But tonight he was nursing a root-beer, and his eyes scanned the bar every couple of seconds. He somehow managed to do that while still seeming cool and intelligent, and not just intensely creepy.

Thor frowned. “Why not?”

Hogun’s fingers lifted, creating air quotes. “ _‘Bathroom’_. With Jane. Half an hour ago.”

"...Oh."

Thor sighed. Even he knew what that meant, and he wasn’t exactly up to scratch on his lesbian code-terms for casual sex. He should have seen this coming.

“Hopefully she’s not an exclusive gal…” He mumbled hopefully. He wasn’t interested in sloppy seconds, but if the lady wanted a lady, then a lady she would have. He’d be a dick to try and get in the way of that. If, later Sif still kinda didn’t mind the look of him, then he was lucky. He hoped to be lucky.

“Bad luck” Fandral commented, this time kissing along the girl’s neck while the boy kissed along his throat, leaving raspberry-coloured markings. Winding an arm around the enthusiastic guy, Thor’s friend looked at him.

“No reason why you can’t jump in the middle. They might not mind.”

Thor shrugged.

“And if they do mind? I’d ruin their night, that’s just uncalled for.”

Fandral frowned, going back to the bartender, letting the girl stop to chug her drink. Either Fandral was incredibly thirsty work, or she had to drink a little more to keep him looking as appetising as he had an hour ago.

He went to stand up.

“I’m gonna go drown my feelings. Anybody need a refill?”

While his friends shook their heads, one of Volstagg’s lady friends raised her hand.

“Vodka mixer?” She requested around a mouthful of bar snacks. Thor smiled.

“On me, I’m guessing?”

She nodded as if it wasn’t a question. Drinks were cheap, and Thor was almost known for not asking the price guys usually put on free drinks after 8pm. He headed off to the bar to buy some shots and a drink for a lady he didn’t know. Maybe he’d rediscover his good mood on the way there.

 

Another half-hour later Jane emerged, pink-faced and lips bitten red, slumping happily next to Thor’s seat at the bar. Grinning at how content she seemed, he swiped a water bottle from behind the bar, slid a note in the register and pushed it towards her. He may have been on his third shot, but he knew an afterbuzz when he saw one. She needed hydration.

“Thanks...” Jane hummed, upending the water bottle and tossing the crackly empty bottle aside when she was done. Thor got up to replace it for her...but he was unsteady. He sat back down.

“Sif h-here?” He asked, his tongue clumsy in his mouth and hard to control. Jane nodded.

“She’s in the back, getting changed.” She informed him, happily leaning her chin on her arms.

“So how are you, Thor?”

Jane’s voice, sleepy and soft as it was, cut through his slightly drunken haze. He’d been imagining Sif...weary but satisfied, pulling off her shirt, probably too sweaty to keep on, sliding into something different, perhaps tighter…

“ **Thor.** ”

He went a little pink faced, nodding to show he was paying attention. He felt a little guilty, especially with Jane sitting beside him. To make himself feel better, he made an effort to produce polite, coherent conversation, even though his tongue felt like it weighed forty pounds.

“M’good, thankss. Scholarship’s looking good…” he slurred.

“That’s nice to hear. And Loki?”

“He’s a little shit. Other-wise fine.” He frowned slightly. “Why’dyou ask?”

Jane and Loki weren't exactly the best of friends. For the record, both Jane and Thor maintained Loki had earned the slap she’d given him.

Jane looked around for the bartender, her eyes found him on Fandral and unable to serve her, and she cussed before leaning over the bar to grab another water bottle, opening her hand for Thor to pay for her. He did so, waiting for a reply.

“He wasn’t all that happy in English last week...at least from what I could tell. His grade wasn’t up to usual standard, and I wanted to know if he was feeling better.”

Thor made a face, perplexed. Loki? his nerdy little brother? top of the class in every lesson, save for P.E? the kid who only didn’t score 100% on his final math exam because he deliberately skipped a question so Thor wouldn’t tease him?

“How come?!” He was baffled.

Jane’s shrug was graceful as she sat herself on the bartop. She wasn’t a bad looking girl...very pretty. Hugely intelligent, nice hair, good sense of humour...no wonder Sif had snapped her up so fast. He’d congratulate them both later.

“I didn’t ask. Didn’t you notice him acting weird?”

“No...how bad a grade are we talking?” Concern sobered him up a little.

“Like, 34% bad.”

The female scientist shuddered almost comically. Thor felt a little queasy himself, hearing such a test score. Contrary to popular belief, he was secretly one of the best in most classes. He’d be better if football didn’t dominate everything else.

“Damn…”

He turned away from her for a second. God, this was so weird...he couldn’t understand it. How could Loki do so poorly? he was looking to get accepted to St. Frigga’s the year after next, post-graduation...he’d never make it with grades like that. He’d had the college prospectus taped to his wall for a year.

“Do you know his other recent test scores?”

After thinking a minute and giving Thor a fair few odd looks, Jane managed to give Thor a list of all the poor test scores that had been bad enough to stick in her memory. Nodding and giving her a forced smile, Thor returned to the booth, where Fandral was now alone and looking happy, the right side of his face smeared with pink lipstick, Hogun looed like he was on his fifth root beer and Volstagg looked irritated and poorer than he had earlier. It was then that Thor realised he had entirely forgotten to get his lady friend her vodka mixer.

Concern for Loki curdled in his stomach, and he was vaguely aware that he should really be heading home to discuss it with him, that was, as he raised his hand to order another round of shots.

                                                                                                                                 0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

Thor got in around 3am, totally wasted and not all that happy. He’d lost his money when Fandral saw how drunk he was and took the time to demand shots, he’d kissed a couple girls and a handful of guys, but not wanted to go home with any of ‘em. None of them tasted right. Eventually he’d ended up handing the painful bill to the bitten bartender and jumped in the back of Volstagg’s dad’s pickup truck. His ass was covered in motor oil now, and it had made for an uncomfortable and slippery ride home.

Stumbling in, he went to turn on the light...to find the slim familiar silhouette in his peripheral, that should have startled him, perhaps scared him.

But nothing about Loki had ever made him uncomfortable.

He felt a smile try to pull at the corners of his lips, but was too drunk to acknowledge it. It was common with him.

Loki was curled up on the couch, three empty bottles of his favourite soft drink cluttering the floor, his feet up in their mismatching converse, one green one black, and the astronomy book on his knees in front of him. His headphones were lodged in, his music evidently too loud to alert him of his brother’s return. Thor felt a little guilty tugging one of them out.

Nonplussed, Loki’s hand lifted to push it back in from whence it came, not batting an eyelid.

“Hey, you smell like a bartender’s ass.” He greeted him.

Thor shrugged it off, leaning down, then when a rush of nausea washed over him like an unwelcome shower, he straightened. Bad idea.

“Hey. W-wanna talk ‘bout any...thing?”

“Is there a reason you have a hickey the size of Greece?” Loki dodged, distracting him.

“Shuddup!”

“As if.”

Thor stood still for a moment, swaying and hoping that whatever it was rising in his throat, that it would stop soon and let him focus. Eventually, he lowered a heavy hand and put it on Loki’s shoulder. And something in the gesture told the younger boy not to shrug it off.

“...I talked to Jane today.” He said, making a Herculean effort to not walk away or throw up. Both of which options looked good right now.

“Ew. Why would you ever do that?”

“Well, she st-stole my girl.”

He had to wait another while for Loki to quit laughing.

“Excellent, damn, remind me to high five her next time I see her. Awesome.” Loki chuckled, eyes twinkling gleefully. Thor sighed, and blurted.

“She toldMe you got bad test re-scores!” He spluttered out, perhaps louder than he usually would have done. He...got somehow stuck between the words ‘results’ and ‘scores’. In no less than a heartbeat, Loki snapped his book shut and was walking away. A little alarmed by the speed, Thor blundered after him.

“Hey! wAit!”

Loki walked quickly away from him, making a sharp right to avoid the table, disconcerting the football player enough that he kicked it on the same toe he’d almost broken earlier that day. Thor doubled over, cursing.

“I wanna- **FUCK** -Ugh...I wanna know wHY you did so bad! I th-ought you were-hic!-goin’ to collegE!” Wow, he was more of a mess than he'd thought.

“Since when is that your business? keep your nose outta my grades, and my life, for that matter.” Loki said coolly, but his burning eyes told a different story.

Although he was generally used to Loki being kind of a passive-aggressive asshole, those words stung for some reason. And the feeling that rose in his belly like fire was indignation, and alcohol-fuelled, good old fashioned anger. He was angry - _he_ should have been the first to know about the test scores. _He_ should have been there with him, maybe tutoring to make him better, rubbing his back while he cried or yelled or got mad, or maybe showed emotion like a **normal** fucking human being!

“s’MY business’cause I am your brother! m’sorry, but I am! I CARE ‘bout these things!” Thor shouted.

“HALF BROTHER!” Loki shouted, spinning round to meet him. And, for some reason, this triggered a hot, red instinct inside of Thor that propelled him to grab Loki by the shoulders, thrusting him up and against the wall, forcing him to look at him.

He pressed his lips to Loki’s, trapping him in the little space between him and the wall. As opposed to what would be expected, the kiss was gentle, thick with emotion - agitated anger being the most prominent one. And...finally, Thor found the taste he’s been looking for. Something between vanilla coke and something sweeter. Maybe that was just Loki.

After a second the two pulled away from each other, mirroring eachothers looks of surprise and confusion...perhaps less than confusion than was due, considering Thor had just rage-kissed his baby brother.

Thor stumbled back, letting Loki streak away like an alley cat, upstairs to his room with his eyes down, and Thor later passed out on the couch Loki had so recently vacated.

 **  
** But that night, he slept with just the right flavour in his mouth. And that was all he cared about.


	4. Puppy Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally. His hankering for Loki's flavour has been satisfied, Thor has done it. He's kissed him. So...what now? Thor consults concerned friends for some sort of advice, but ends up getting all the confirmation he needs when he comes home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for some reason this was literally the easiest and most fun chapter for me. hope you feel the same  
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_avdXAuNSZc

The next couple of days that ensued after Loki and Thor’s kiss were spent mostly in avoiding each other. Thor couldn’t figure out why. In fact, he’d really rather they do the opposite. After all this time, all these years spent exchanging teasing looks, beyond awkward encounters after showers, those delicious smiles that just made him melt…

After all that he had finally grown a pair and kissed him.

...and now Loki wouldn’t stay in the same room as him.

Thor supposed it was understandable. It’s not exactly a normal occurrence; to be drunkenly kissed by your older brother. Or...half brother, of course. Loki should be confused, taken aback, maybe scared. Even questioning why he was awkward around him now was selfish thinking, but he found he couldn’t help it. He needed to be selfish, if that was the kind of thinking that got him any closer to Loki. He’d do anything.

“Hell-oo!”

An obnoxious hand waved in front of his face at high speed, and he found himself jolting back to earth so quickly he smacked his head on the back of his seat.

“Jeez, you were out of it!” Darcy exclaimed, going back to her beverage. It was a skittles milkshake, with banana and peach and coconut sprinkles...it looked more like a radioactive explosion. It fitted it’s drinker to a tea.

“Sorry, I reserve the right to space out without being assaulted.” He grumbled, nursing his coke. He couldn’t stand the stuff, but they were out of the vanilla. Probably because he’d been here yesterday, drinking up all their stock. It was Loki’s flavour.

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic.” Darcy waved this aside, playing with the bendy straw in her drink, accidentally splattering both Thor and Jane with milkshake. Jane wiped it off her arm without complaining, a smile lighting her features as she tapped away at her phone. Darcy had managed to hack into the cafe’s wifi for her, and she was talking to Sif. It was pretty cute.

“You didn’t tell me why you were spacing out.” Darcy said.

“Excellent deduction.” He muttered dryly, knocking back the last of his coke. He slammed his hand down on the table.

“ _ **ANOTHER**_ ”

“Got it, Thor!”

The waiter hurried to go get him another drink. He was new, his name was Ian. Or..was it...John? David? He turned back to Jane and Darcy.

“C’mon, enlighten us. You haven’t been yourself for days. All you’ve done is play football.”

“Isn’t that all I usually do?”

“Nah, usually you’re more jolly. That tackle yesterday was brutal, you looked like a big blonde killing machine.”

He took a second to bask in the compliment. That left tackle had been kinda strong, but it was ok. Volstagg could take it. His arm had popped back into place just fine.

“Well, I guess I’ve got a lot on my mind is all.”

“Alot on  your mind?! it’s Summer! relax!”

Darcy Lewis never had encountered a problem with taking a holiday, regardless of whether or not she had earned it.

“Easy for you to say. All you’ve got on is that physics club and it’s not for weeks. If I want the scholarship next year I’m gonna have to work hard, and the elite standard of working hard is way harder than mine. I gotta work myself to the bone, or I’m never gonna make it!”

Wow. Now that he thought of it he was pretty stressed about that, when his mind wasn’t caught up in a wash of pretty eyes and decorated lips.

Darcy made those calm down gestures with her hands that never, ever succeeded in calming anyone down.

“Leave him alone, Darcy. We’re all stressed apart from you, not everyone can reach your standard of ‘brain-dead’ meets ‘doesn’t-give-a-fuck’.” Jane said quietly.

Darcy raised an eyebrow, but then a ladybug crawled up the leg of the table, and she amused herself with that.

“Thanks.” Thor muttered as he took the coke from the waiter and nodded gratefully at Jane. She shrugged.

“I gotta live with her this Summer, I learned a couple tricks on how to shut her up.” She explained.

Thor supposed that made sense. He stared out of the window, moodily sipping his coke. Pointless. Without the overly-sweet vanilla flavouring it was tasteless. Bland. He poured it into Darcy’s milkshake, where it created a chemical reaction that made the young physics student grin.

His phone beeped in his pocket, making him jump. He took it out moodily, pressing on the little yellow envelope icon.

**JANE: would you tell me why you’re acting so weird?**

Thor made a face, typing without looking up at Jane, so as not to draw Darcy’s attention.

 ******YOU: Already did. idk what you want me to say.**

Jane raised an eyebrow.

 ******JANE: I see. when you feel like telling me the truth gimme a call.**

Thor gave a small nod before tapping the HOME button and switching off his phone. Jane went back to her and Sif’s conversation, and the obvious change in her face was adorable. Her smile threatened to split her face, and Thor liked to see his friend so happy.

“Well, I should be going. Dad probably wants me home.” He said, swinging his bag onto his back, nearly killing the couple in the booth behind them. It was a lie, of course. Odin wouldn’t be home for weeks, he’d told them that when he got the call and left late last night. Barely said goodbye. Not that it bothered him.

“See you later.” Jane nodded, and Darcy waved her hand distractedly, still watching the bubbles in the milkshake/coke fizz. Thor sighed as he left the cafe. He’d at least hoped he’d feel normal spending time with friends.

That was, if he could ever feel ‘normal’ again.

0o0o0o0o0o

“I’m home!”

Thor shouted as he came through the door, throwing his shoes and bag down.

There was no sound, but he could see a tendril of ink-black hair hanging down from between one of the bannisters. Loki had curled up there like a cat, lying on his stomach and flipping through his astronomy book. He must have finished the damn thing a thousand times, it perplexed Thor why he still bothered to read it. When Thor read books, they were over in a heartbeat, at which point he would immediately lose interest in them. Why start again when you know what’s going to happen?

When Thor came in, Loki stiffened. He gathered his book, and coolly came down the stairs. In less than a second, Thor snapped. He spun, lifting the little astronomer off his feet and down onto the armchair, pinning his arms to the armrests and hovering above him.

Loki didn’t struggle. That was not his way. Thor, however, did not miss the flash of panic that sprung through his eyes. And at last, he’d gotten what he wanted. He had gotten Loki to feel.

“Are you gonna let me up, or do I need to call the cops?”

“You don’t need to call the cops on me. M’not gonna hurt ya.”

“Then let me go.”

“ _No._ ”

Loki hissed. He actually _hissed,_ like a fucking stray cat. Thor could feel his muscles, tense and wiry beneath his skin, straining against him. Thor held him down easily but it would have been a problem for someone built like Ian.

“What do you want?!”

“Acknowledgement. I want you to look at me, Loki. I want you to feel!”

“All I’m feeling is the urge to kill you. Then again that’s nothing new, now GET OFF ME!”

Thor threw himself forward, smothering Loki with his heat and crushing his lips to his. As usual, this did the trick in subduing Loki. He kissed back, warm and hard and pliant in his arms. Thor’s big hands left his arms, releasing him momentarily...and that was Thor’s first mistake.

Loki flipped them, inexplicably moving him under his body and forcing his wrists above his head, keeping him still, despite his brother being at least twice his height and weight. Thor looked up incredulously.

“Y-you…”

“Listen closely.” Loki whispered, face inches from his and eyes flaring. There was something different in him...something wild, something fierce. And Thor had never seen it in him...but he couldn’t honestly say he didn’t like it.

“I am not yours to play around with, I’m not yours to own. I’m myself, my own, and if I want to be touched by you, you will know. Do you understand?”

Thor gulped. “I do understand.”

Loki released him, getting up and walking off. And not even the beloved flavour on Thor's tongue could compensate for the thrumming of his heart beneath his skin.


	5. Counting Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This fanfic will be going on a mini-hiatus, starting 25th July, and ending on August 5th. I am deeply sorry, but I have summer school and very little time to pop chapters out.   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BMnXXrvcyA

The next couple of days were spent like the few before it. Even after Odin came home, few words were exchanged, and few gestures or even looks were shared. That was the way their household operated. Odin was used to it with his youngest son, but it was so out of character for Thor that he brought it up over dinner one night, after Thor got up, ready to slink up to his room after Loki was just standing, getting ready to do so.

“What’s wrong with you, Thor? is it a girl?”

Of course it had to be a girl. Why would a boy think of anything else? Why would a girl have anything other or better to do than to torment the boys of her school? God forbid she have no interest in boys, or anything other than getting manicures and going shopping. Though, there was nothing wrong with doing those things...

He wasn’t aware he’d spaced out until Loki flicked a pea at him. Thor had fallen in with the progressive crowd at school, and he found the more time he spent with them to get his mind off the taste of Loki, the more he started talking like a radical feminist. Worst things could happen.

“...yeah, this one girl in the girl’s team. I’ll get over her.”

It wasn’t totally a lie.

Odin nodded his head, approval twinkling in his eyes. All it took was the right combination of words.

"Well, don’t let it eat at you. Invite her over for dinner, get acquainted.  Did you buy her a gift?”

“Yes, Thor. Woo her. That’s not creepy or outdated at all.” Loki cut in from across the table, voice with it’s usual cutting snark. Thor hadn’t noticed until then just how much he had missed it.

Odin gave Loki a look, his one eye scowling. “Loki, do you have something you’d like to say to myself or your brother?”

The words were a mild threat disguised as an innocent question. Loki pushed the last of his pork with apple sauce to the far corner of his plate.

“No, Odin. May I be excused?”

“You’ve never needed permission before.”

Loki sighed, pushing away his knife and fork. Thor’s eyes scanned the plate, and what was left on it. He’d been the only one to notice that his little brother was off his food. He’d been going to order pizza to coax him...but then Odin had come home. Odin didn’t let his sons eat the processed cardboard crap that fuelled the remainder of their generation.

Loki’s chair scraped the floorboards as he stood to leave, brushing past Thor. Thor gulped, standing to follow automatically.

“Are you done eating?” Odin called after him.

Thor took a second to acknowledge that no, he wasn’t. Even with the amount of food he shovelled in his mouth per second he hadn’t finished. He’d been too busy thinking like a progressive politician.

He took his seat, playing with his food for a moment before picking up his fork again.

“So, this girl you talked about. Is it Sif Edda, by any chance?”

Thor choked on his vanilla coke. Stolen admittedly. Loki hadn’t seemed to mind, only seemed vaguely amused and maybe flattered. With the amount of time Thor had to form a reply for his father, he did what any usual son would do under pressure. Lied through his teeth.

“Yep, you uh...you caught me, dad.”

“That’s my boy! I was thinking of having her father round, haven’t spoken to him in a long time.”

Sif’s dad was a high-up business executive. Mr Edda had worked with Odin for years, working one-off partnerships here and there. That was how Thor and Sif had met, at some office Christmas party. He’d itched in the suit his dad had given him, and she was the only girl there who didn’t gawk at him like he was a cut of fresh meat. They’d spent the night talking about Norse mythology and sports.

“I’ve been thinking about having him over for dinner for a while, and a couple of the boys from the office. I can ask her father to bring Sif with him! how’s that sound?”

Alarm bells began ringing in Thor’s head. There was no good reason why Sif shouldn’t come over, but the whole damn deal was awkward. He could see it now...Odin nudging him with his elbow when she came in, looking a him expectantly whenever there was an opportunity for them to interact...Gods help him.

“Will Loki be there?” He spluttered, desperately grabbing at any possible silver lining. Maybe with Loki there it wouldn’t be so bad…

Odin seemed to take a moment to chew his lip, to actually think about whether or not his own youngest son would be allowed down to eat with them.

Thor’s heart gave a jump when his father gave his grumbled answer. “He can if he can find a suit that fits.”

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

Thor had to call Sif at 4 in the morning to sort things out and apologise for the misunderstanding, and once she’d stopped laughing at him, the plan was set. They’d come over to dinner, Sif would feign mild interest, Thor would feign mild longing and disappointment at appropriate intervals. The evening would end, yadda yadda yadda...and by the end of it, Odin would have the impression his son had a boner for the captain of the girl’s football team, and not for his own younger brother. A miracle, indeed.

When the night came, Loki miraculously didn’t avoid Thor as much as usual, requesting his help with dusting off his dress shirt and finding shoes that weren’t converse, and later, Loki relied on him to give him the lecture on why limited edition DC Joker converse were not appropriate evening wear, and why Loki should give a fuck about what was actually suitable. Any excuse to talk to him, but fuck it was exhausting.

He knew very well the reason why all of a sudden Loki cared about looking ‘appropriate’ for an evening party with Odin’s friends from work. For all his grumbling, approval from their father was something Loki had craved from day 1. It was the only chink in Loki’s thick suit of armour, and it was a vulnerability Thor and Loki never discussed. Nor did they plan to, or need to.

The doorbell rang at about 8 o’clock, causing their old grey cat, Frigga, to jump off the laundry basket and seek refuge elsewhere. Usually Loki was available for treats and attention, but he was in the bathroom trying to get his hair to stay down, and without him, she had to please herself by rubbing herself against Thor’s ankles and tripping him up every five minutes.

“Asshole cat.” Thor muttered, swatting the Maine Coone away. She was hardly a family cat, she’d belonged to Loki from the moment they’d met. The skinny kid with the puffy red-rimmed eyes and the clothes from goodwill. She’d jumped on him like it was his last night on earth, and not gotten off his lap since. She was irritated he’d left without petting her goodbye.

“Yeah, I know, Frigga, I know.” Thor muttered, picking her up to deposit her on the cat bed. He stroked along her fur, trying not to get hairs on the suit Odin had made him wear.

“I love him, too.”

The cat responded by yowling and streaking away, dodging Odin, who cursed as he came over to Thor to do up his tie. Thor had never mastered ties.

“How are you feeling, son?”

Annoyed. Crabby. Lonely. Uncomfortable.

“Awesome, dad, can’t wait.” Thor told him brightly.

Odin clapped his back, beaming. It didn’t look natural in his face. “My first couple of friends arrived, along with someone who’d like to see you.”

Darcy bounded through the door, in a little red dress that hugged her nicely. For the third time that week, Thor choked on his drink while his father slunk away to take guest’s coats for them.

“Darcy?!” Thor spluttered.

“Sup, Thor” She answered.

Typical. “What are you doing here?” He demanded, wiping water from his chin. Loki had begun hoarding his vanilla coke stash, as he reached a rare shortage. It was his fault for tasting so good in the first place.

“Dad was invited, and he wouldn't let me stay home alone with all my science kit.” She explained.

That made more sense than Thor cared to admit. Darcy was a gifted chemist, but sense was not her strong point. Or perhaps it was, she just neglected to employ it very often.

“Someone had to keep me company while I convince your dad I’m into guys.” Sif muttered, approaching them, wearing a silver sparkly long dress that caught Thor’s eye for more reasons than one. He picked up a napkin with a canape on it and a glass of wine, handing it to her.

“I am sorry about this.”

The night was starting, and guests were filing in. By the door, Odin was politely greeting Darcy’s father, Erik Selvig, and about half a dozen other dreary bearded guys in suits were milling around. It put his fear of growing up in physical form. Thor knocked back a glass of wine.

“S’fine, confused the hell outta my dad, though. I came out to him years ago, so now he just thinks Jane and I are testing men out.”

“Well, I appreciate the cover story. This’ll get dad off my back, he’s wanted me to get a girlfriend since forever.”

Darcy and Sif shot him sympathetic looks. He’d been complaining about his father’s attitude on the topic of dating since he turned sixteen. It was pushy to say the least. To say the most it was borderline harassment. Odin wanted his oldest son to either get a job and make it big, or start a family, then have sons, who would grow up to get a job and make it big. Thus the circle would continue until one of them died.

“It’s an honour to carry on the already-established family lie.” Sif said with a smile that looked a little tight, drinking her wine. Thor wondered why until he saw she was without her phone, and thus without Jane. He patted her back.

“I suggest you and I switch to water, or we’re gonna have alcohol poisoning by eleven.”

0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0

After an hour or two of awkward conversations and overly fancy starters, and one cumbersome incident encompassing Darcy, a glass of wine and a mysterious flask of concentrated sodium carbonate, dinner was underway. Loki had slipped in just before they all sat down, face very pale green. By the way he was shoving down the leftover rice crackers Thor would guess he wasn’t feeling too good. He sat quietly between Darcy’s father and some other guy.

“So, Thor, it’s nice to put a name to a face.” Said some guy across the table. Apparently he was some kind of manager. Important guys were usually sort of menacing-looking. He was sitting opposite Loki, which would explain why Thor hadn’t been paying him any attention to him whatsoever.

“Thank you, Sir.” He beamed casually. He knew how to behave in front of Odin’s friends. Kiss ass like no tomorrow.

“No problem, son. So what do you do?”

“I play football and I’m fixing for a sports scholarship next year. Hoping to make it pro.”

There was a polite and quiet murmur in response, in which Sif reached for another scoop of new potatoes and Darcy intercepted it on the way, tipping them onto her own plate. She liked potatoes.

“Sounds amazing! you know, it’s not often that I meet a boy like you, Odin can talk the ears off any of us in the office. How smart you are, how talented. It warms my heart as a father, if only mine were like that.”

Thor smiled, already bored and studying the way Loki’s jaw jumped when he swallowed his fourth cup of vanilla coke.

“Thank you, Mister…?”

He extended the space of silence after the word to turn it into a question. The man nodded, wiping a smear of tapenade from his chin.

“Fury, Nick Fury. I own your dad’s enterprise and manage most of his colleagues.”

 _Oh, fuck._ That was alot of power. Thor found himself sitting up straighter.

“Oh, really. Pleasure to meet you, Sir.”

“And you. So tell me, what’s it like being the son of Odin, CEO and business associate of Avenge Enterprise?”

Big, fancy names for a load of guys sitting round tables and having meetings. Thor had never seen the point of it, and Loki downright rebelled against it, but in the end, he had to make dad proud. It was all he was good for.

“Uh, really cool, nick, it’s really cool. Assuming I can call you Nick?”

Familiarity, informality. A tricky tactic, but one of the best. Make them feel young and part of the loop, when really that ship sailed not long before the Titanic. Nick nodded, a smile warming his face, and Thor internally patted himself on the back.

“No problem. It’s just an honour to meet a young man like yourself. Odin never shuts up about his boy.”

Thor vaguely heard the sharp yet small twin clatters of Sif and Darcy’s forks dropping from their hands. Of course. Boy. Not boys. Boy. One. Singular. Him.

Forgetting all about Loki was a common occurrence in the household, and not even Loki himself was ever surprised that his own dad prefered not to mention him to his esteemed colleagues. That was what was so sad about it.

Thor took a sip of his drink. “Thank you, Sir.”

Dinner passed on for a while, no way near as quiet as Thor would have liked. That was, until, Thor felt his own anger rise up in him, like the bubbles in Darcy’s over-carbonated soda. It wasn’t just because of this treatment towards his loved one, this damned negligence of him and every accomplishment he’d ever made..it was the fact that Loki had never known better, so he accepted it. Thor would not allow their father to force him to accept it. He tapped his spoon against the side of his glass, asking for attention.

“Yes, Thor?” Erik answered, drawing attention to his daughter’s friend by cutting off the guy he was talking to mid-sentence. All the guests turned to look, Loki looking quietly up from his first untouched helping of chocolate souffle. It was probably because it didn’t have any pistachios in it...Odin never bought the ones that were Loki’s favourite.

“...Loki got the award for Best Upcoming Amateur Astronomer 2012.” He said.

There was the usual murmur, slightly confused and nowhere near as loud as before. Loki looked up, cheeks flushing ever so slightly, but he didn’t stop him. In fact, an expression graced his features, something Thor had never encountered in his brother before. It was gratitude. It spurred him on.

“...is that so?” Nick murmured, wiping his mouth. Thor nodded.

“He was number one in Chemistry class every semester two years running, and his portfolio recently got featured in the school newspaper, just before school broke up for Summer. He got offered to be class president cause of his skills in mathematics, and he is the best chemist I ever met.”

“Why are you telling us this, Thor?” Odin asked her, peering down from the head of the table. The rest of the room was quiet, and the tension was similar to that of a guitar string being tightened until it snapped. His father’s tone was tight, controlled, a warning. A warning the linebacker no longer cared to heed.

“Because Loki doesn’t deserve to be ignored the way you ignore him. He has value and worth just the same as me, and I love him more than you ever will.”

It was like a paused moment, a stop in time, as if Thor had stepped into one of those low-budget kids movies and somehow enchanted a TV remote to pause real life. Until it shattered, moments later. In a second, Loki had dashed out, swinging his coat on in the hallway and grabbing his bag, the door clicking gently shut behind him, not his usual slamming gesture after a run-in. Really _really_  not wanting to take the silence and the aftermath of his own fatal error, Thor pressed a kiss to Sif’s cheek to keep up the lie and headed out after him, this time banging the door shut so hard that a hinge jumped straight out of the mechanism. Perhaps it needed to escape, too.

0o0o0o

Not having seen where his baby brother went proved to be an issue when navigating the streets of Thor’s neighbourhood at night. Luckily the lazy summer sun had the sky stained peach-pink, and despite the cooling rain that slowly reached flooding proportions as he walked, the light left no darkness or residual shadow in which to conceal a runaway Loki.

Thor passed the cafe, Heimdall’s bar, the pizzeria that sold Lok’s favourite goats cheese and caramelised onion pizza, the library, the duck pond, none of them showing him his brother. A little disheartened, Thor went for a moody walk along the sidewalk, letting the concrete guide his steps. Perhaps he should have been worried, but he wasn’t. Not really. Loki was like an alley cat, and he knew his way around the homely suburbia like the back of his hand, just as Thor did. He’d be fine.

Unfortunately, while Thor may have known his own streets well when he had a clear mind, while being distracted and rained on, he was completely useless. He took a wrong turn, then a right, then a left...and the next thing he knew, he was standing outside of a building he didn’t even know his town had. He squinted up at the lettering above the doorway, peering up and wiping the water from his eyes to see.

**LAUFEYSON AMATEUR DANCE COMPANY  
**   


And outside, unmistakably, were Loki’s shoes, obviously too wet to walk in, but left in the little shelter area to dry. Without any further hesitation, Thor jammed his way through the door to find his brother.

The moment he went in, passing doors marked ‘Changing Facilities’ and etc, being assaulted by the whiff of hairspray and fabric detergent, he heard it. That distinct sound that he’d only hear a couple times in his life, but since he had heard it, it proved unmistakable. It was the sound of someone dancing, the distinct thump of feet on floor was complimented by the music, which was playing from an ipod dock on one of the many stacks of chairs all shoved to the sidelines. As if he was dreaming, Thor followed the sounds and walked into the studio.

Loki was there. Dancing, spinning, throwing himself into different positions, in a routine that Thor had never before seen. He swung himself across the floor, putting every inch of force and power into each step, and the strain on his muscles from just making it look effortless was leaving a sheen of sweat on his skin.

He leapt and twirled, every inch the grace and poise of a ballet dancer. The music played along, some modern song that Loki loved, but the dancing boy didn’t move to the rhythm, as the music moved with him. Almost like some obsequious accompaniment, not even close to the perfection it was up against. And how could it be?

In the middle of a pirouette, Loki saw he had a voyeur and juddered to a standstill in the middle of the step, his eyes fixed on Thor like a startled animal. Without a moments hesitation Thor closed the space between them and held him in a passionate kiss. And this time he didn’t need to force or hold or restrain Loki, because Loki held his own, winding his arms and legs around his body and clinging on like he was a liferaft. His liferaft.

His chest, still heaving from the dance was pressed against Thor’s chest, heart to heart. Or was it just fluttering like that because of the closeness? Thor would never know.

As they embraced, Loki gently calming in the arms of his big brother, and beginning to cry out the evening into his shoulder, the song played solo from the ipod dock, obviously glad to not have to compete with the amazing dancer anymore.

 _Aint' no more counting dollars, we'll be counting stars..._ ****  
  
  
  
  



	6. Safe and Sound

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter picks up where last one left off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have resolved to make this at least a ten chapter story, if not more, and perhaps sequels after that, in which I will be exploring my newly found love for Thorki (you heard correctly).  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5K4PGpXsOAI

 

_“You’ll always be love’s great martyr. And I’ll be the flattered fool.” - Blake Shelton_

 

Thor and Loki procrastinated moving from their embrace, choosing instead to stand there in the hall, suspended in the moment, Thor’s arms wrapped around the younger boy, while Loki cried out the feelings left behind in the whirl of the dance, never managing to have pirouetted fast enough to shake off all the sadness.

After a moment, Loki felt warmth on his wet cheeks, Thor’s calloused fingers brushing his tears away. He couldn’t remember crying in front of anyone in living memory, after moving in with Odin and Thor. Embarrassed, he hid his face in his hands.

“No, don’t…” Thor mumbled, and Loki peeked at him in confusion. His brother’s smile sent a warm glow radiating through him, thawing the frost that had set around his heart all those years ago. Still not melted, but beginning to drip.

He cupped Loki’s cheek in his big hand, which meant there was nowhere to hide. And bizarrely, Loki still felt safe, echoing the smile Thor sent him. The gesture said more than either of them could have.

Thor wet his lips uncomfortably. A thousand cliches and compliments danced on his tongue, ready to be chosen and used. _You’re beautiful, you amaze me, you’re perfect, I love you_.

No. Not yet.

“S-so you dance?” He spluttered.

...it was a start.

Loki made a snorting noise, and that was it. The invisible shell around them cracked, and in it came pouring delicious familiarity, and Loki started snickering. This football player breathed out a relieved sigh. He’d fixed him.

“I do, yes. I’ve been dancing ballet since I was four. When I moved out here the ballet company I danced with had a branch in town, and they accepted me for free as long as I agreed to teach kids on the weekends.”

“Wow...that’s cool of them. Why didn’t you just ask dad for the money?”

A small frown darkened Loki’s smooth forehead, his mouth changing shape just a little, the labret stud pushing out.

“I...I couldn’t. My mom used to work ridiculous hours, and sometimes I wouldn’t see her all day until she came home at 3 in the morning just so she could kiss me goodnight and make me tomorrow’s lunch before passing out. She worked extra hours to pay for my dancing, and I wouldn’t want to sour that by just getting some rich guy to pay for me.”

“Even if ‘some rich guy’ happens to be your dad?” Thor asked quietly.

Loki’s head lifted to look at him, and Thor was momentarily trapped in the ring of blue around black.

“I don’t know, since when has Odin considered me a son?”

There were a few minutes of silence, save for the thump of Thor’s heart against Loki’s ear, and the steady crunch of Thor’s feet on gravel, increasing in volume when they reached the driveway. Loki wriggled to get down, and Thor let him, his hand lingering on the small of his back as he did so.

“I’ll go stay with Jane tonight, tell Odin I’ll be back tomorrow morning.”

“I’ll pick you up at 9 and we’ll go for breakfast.” Thor said, and he grinned as he saw the hope collect on Loki’s face.

“We can get goats cheese and onion pizza.”

Loki smiled, and abruptly, shoved Thor hard enough to make him stumble. Thor went down like a felled tree, frowning up and going to stand again. Loki kept him down, jumping down to straddle him, and then his confused brother realised what he was doing. In the light of the upstairs windows, Thor and Loki would be entirely visible. However, where Loki had shoved him, they were concealed by a tree...safely, and totally hidden. He grinned as his brother slipped down to his mouth for a kiss.

Loki’s kisses were warm and soft, for this was a dance they’d been dancing for years. Moving in a secret unspoken language of silent stares and silver half-smiles, of tinkling laughs and long Summer nights. Finally, the dance had reached it’s end, and oh how glorious the applause would be.

Thor’s hands stroked up Loki’s sides, tracing each line of his tattoos, the skin there was beautiful to begin with, pale like milk and clear...but it was even more beautiful for every freckle, every mole, every blotch of uneven colour was exquisite. Remarkable.

Loki was a work of art, and Thor the grateful consumer of his beauty.

“..I love you, Loki.” Thor whispered, as he stood, still in the appreciated arms of shadows in front of the house. Smiling and accepting his help up, Loki went in for another kiss...and dodged him, walking off into the dark.

Thor stood there dumbfounded for a moment, and had been about to go inside sadly when his phone buzzed in his pants.

**Loki: I love you too, idiot.**

 


	7. David

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It takes a while for a boy to become a man. Yet for Loki, it took little more than 2 years, and a blue-eyed big brother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is gonna be a chapter more focusing on Loki and his perspective, as I’ve been almost dreading doing for so long. it shows his personal growth from boy to man, and his emotional coming-of-age that happens prior to where the timeline of LFIL begins.   
> ((WARNING: Spoilers, however this chapter goes into detail about how Loki's mother dies. She dies of Sudden Unexpected Death In Epilepsy. I researched as much as I could, if this is going to scare you or make you uncomfortable, message me for a chapter summary that does not mention this part.))
> 
> Chapter song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyO3cZLN6p0

To some extent, Loki had always known he was a little different. Not in an ashamed way, not in a social outcast way, not even in a particularly special way, he’d just known he was himself. With any other child, it would have been enough to prompt bullies, but that had never been a problem. Something about his intense eyes and closed-off behaviour told his peers he was best left alone. And after a while, Loki grew to love that arrangement.

It had worried the hell out of his mother, however. She’d always tried to encourage him to interact with other children more, to play in the divided little playground area outside their apartment, and talk to his classmates. He’d had no interest, and besides, why would he choose to waste time on a badly-oiled swing with children he did not like when he could spend the afternoon curled up on the sofa watching documentaries in between mom’s shifts?

He always wanted to spend time with mom.

He longed for those times again, sometimes even now. He’d wake up in his and Thor’s shared bedroom covered with sports posters, and for a moment blink and wonder where are the wind chimes and dream catchers had gone to. She’d filled their tiny rented space with things that made her happy; little cheap things she could find at hippy sales. All the money went toward his school books, food and dancing. He missed her. Loki missed her alot.

Then one day he’d run home from dancing, dumped his bags next to the hat stand and run in, looking for mom because he’d won the award for best improved in the boys class. When Loki did good, mom would pat him on the back and they’d sit and read together. Maybe then they’d go out to eat, some place with a saver menu. He’d found their landlord, sitting next to a man he didn’t recognise, but would come to know as his father. Mr Odinson. And unfortunately, no one was going to pat him on the back or take him out to eat that night.

While he’d been at school, Loki’s mom had had a seizure. It wasn’t a huge deal, she dealt with her epilepsy very well, and she took care of herself so expertly that he’d only ever seen one or two. When they happened when she was on her own, she was usually out of the woods by the time she came to pick him up. Only, she hadn’t come to pick him up that day, and this one had been bad. The doctors called what had happened a long-winded name Loki had been too busy crying to understand, and he wasn’t about to research it now. This seizure had been bad, very bad. And by the time the landlord came down for a consultation, she was gone.

Sudden Unexpected Death In Epilepsy, or SUDEP. The name was just as hard to understand as it was to lose her.

The next day he’d packed his bag, and was sent to live with his next of kin. A man he didn’t know, but the social workers told him he knew him.

“It’s your dad, according to my records.” His social worker, Dr Pym, had told him, rolling a cigarette between his fingers and leaning back in his chair. “He’s a good guy, business owner, young son just a few years older than you, You should all be just fine, but if ever you need me, ask for my number. Ok, kid?”

Loki had no intention of contacting a man who smelled like menthol cigarettes.

It had taken a while to grow used to the new living arrangements. Soon he stopped angling for any type of affection from his father that he’d grown used to from his mother. He hadn’t bothered asking where they’d met, or why he left them penniless. He didn’t really care anymore.

However, this newfound liking for his freaking half-brother was a surprise, or it had been. It had always been there, but he’d kept it well-hidden. Thor’s happy smile, his rippling biceps, the way he put everyone around him before himself. Adorable, but self destructive. A beautiful disaster.

So, in short, it had happened practically overnight in his mind, when all this had unfolded in the span of around two or three years. Its funny how all the people to describe love, poets, writers, actors,etc., will all tell you love happens in one or two ways. Almost immediately, or over a huge amount of time. Apparently Rome  wasn’t built in a day, but an hour, or the other way round.

For Loki, it had been like a slow and steady thrum. A heartbeat. A series of set pulses that beat rhythmically, stopping and starting in harmony with how he felt. Suddenly, that beat had spiked, getting harder and stronger and more powerful by each day, until it snowballed out of control, and hurtled him into the arms of his brother. Where he belonged, and intended to stay.

For now, atleast, for the first time in far too long, the boy with the scabby knees and the tear-streaked face had found his home again.

 **  
** And he wasn’t going anywhere.


	8. No Angels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, heres the much-deserved second to last chapter. A present for a friend that's been going over 5 months, is finally coming to an end and I am able to breathe again. Thank fuck.

His eyes. So big in his face, but not overwhelming, just yet another blue shade of his perfection. Hair getting overgrown, but yet he liked it. He only kept it that way to piss off their father. Skin, so pale and yet so beautiful, like liquid pearls. All Thor wanted to do was bury himself in those eyes, that body...and let himself surrender to the enchantment that was him. Let Loki’s soft arms reach out to take him prisoner, and to live with him in blissful captivity forever more…

“HEY.”

Thor spilled his drink. Damnit...third time today he’d caught himself stuck in his own thoughts. It was bad enough just during school or practice, but it was a damn unfortunate event at a barbecue party, with no immediate access to a cold shower.He made a face at Darcy, who had been the one to uproot his fantasy in the first place. They were standing at the foot of some garden. One of his football buddies had thrown a barbecue party and invited the entire school, so he was here with Darcy, Jane and Sif. At least, Jane and Sif were fucking in a spare bedroom, and had been since their song came on, so he was here with Darcy. The point was, he’d been getting pretty weighed-down recently. It had been about two weeks since he had brought Loki back from the dance academy, and they had barely spoken since. No kisses, no touches...nothing. The younger had kept himself to himself, mostly staying over with Jane, despite their shaky relationship. Not only this, but being constantly needy wasn’t the only thing sending Thor teetering on the edge of insanity. College applications had been sent in, and Thor, along with everyone else his age, was shitting himself. He’d sent off all his forms, and was hoping for his first choice, which...if he was honest with himself...was looking worse and worse the further he fell into Loki’s eye, and longed more and more to curl up and stay there with every glance he threw. 

“JEEZ, two times in a row?! what are you, a lesbian?” Thor sighed, acknowledging his friend again. He hardly had a choice in the matter. 

“Sorry, sorry...distracted.”

“I can tell.” 

Loki was standing with a couple of his nerd friends, and some of the popular crowd from school. Loki had a certain easy charisma that came with acting as cool as he did, and that attracted attention. Good attention. Some girl was talking to him while the guy beside her flipped burgers on the grill, and Loki was more distracted by talking to someone behind him, apparently. Thor couldn’t see properly, he was concealed by a potted plant. Maybe he could casually go over there and find out… 

“S’UP, THOR, MY MAN!” Spoke a voice, offensively loudly next to Thor’s ear. Concealing his grimace, the footballer turned and forced a smile. 

“Hey, Bucky.” 

Bucky Barnes was the guy hosting the party. It wasn’t that Bucky was a bad guy...far from it. Bucky was an amazing guy. Talented, resourceful, friendly, smart...it just so happened that Bucky wasn’t really with the right crowd. Last year he’d stopped hanging out with Steve and Peggy, the military crowd who all trained to be cadettes, and had started hanging out with a group of guys from the bad side of town. Called themselves ‘Hydra’, and were the kind of people to spray paint their insignia onto teachers’ cars if they got a detention. They were constantly roping Bucky into doing stuff he shouldn’t be, but since he hadn’t been caught, no one could convince Bucky to cut his ties with them. Because of this, no one really felt comfortable around the guy. Not any more.

“It’s good to see you here! it’s been too long.”

“Since last practice, you mean?” 

Bucky didn’t hear this, he was too busy downing his drink. It was apparently a collection of whatever liquor was going, but looked more like swamp water. Thor could see Darcy vacate the general premises, and hissed under his breath.

“Yeah, dude, been way too long! listen, I-” 

“Hey, Thor, talk to us a minute?” 

Thor took a moment to thank every active deity he knew. Behind him stood Sif and Jane, Jane looking flushed and pretty drunk, and Sif practically supporting her weight as she smiled brightly up at Thor and Bucky. Bucky looked...vaguely turned on by the image. 

He wet his lips, practically sweating. “Gee, sure, is Jane o-” 

“She’s fine with me, thank you, Bucky.” Every boy in Norse Washington High had a mutual understanding with Sif. Like a mantra, to be read out every day, morning, noon, and night.

_ Don’t touch me, and I won’t crush you. Don’t whistle at me, and I won’t send your mom a random dickpic and claim you sent it to me. Don’t treat me any different than you’d treat your best friend, and I won’t gut you.  _

It was on the principle of this mantra, that Bucky Barnes nodded, and hurried off to get another drink. If that shit could even be called a ‘drink’.

Thor relaxed. “Thanks, Sif.” 

“Don’t thank me. Jane needed some air, and I saw you looking like you’d die any second, so I performed an act of charity. Find Jane a chair, will you?” 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

Thor headed off like a character from a kid’s TV show, about to go on a quest. Damn, folks liked to hog chairs during barbecues. When he did find one and give it over to Sif and Jane, he felt he was deserving of a little break. A little reward. Quietly, he picked up a red cup and sauntered over to the end of the garden, where Loki was. Fandral, Volstagg and Hogun were gathered around the little collapsable table, sipping from red cups of their own.

Volstagg was sprawled beside the grill, kindly relieving it of burger patties and slabs of pulled pork just as quickly as they were cooked, the girl beside him talking to him. She seemed pretty interested...Thor recognised her at once. She was a home economics major, they were probably talking about food. She was pretty, and those macaroons they were discussing did sound kinda delicious. 

Hogun was sitting on the table, ignoring his drink (ginger ale) in favour of the book bent on his lap, as always. Some people could value and appreciate their own company, and Hogun was one. Thor had always admired that. It was only when Thor eyes had gone full circle of the little group that he saw Fandral. Fandral was relaxing on a deck chair, possibly the only one of it’s kind to be found, talking to two girls opposite him. And there, reclined on his lap, jet-black hair nestled on his chest, and magnificent little ass balanced on his thighs, flush against each other...was Loki.

** ~~~~~~~~~ **

Great. Perfect. Of-fucking-course. The lack of any move past their first kiss hadn’t been all in Thor’s head, oh no. It made sense; instead of coming to Thor and voicing his desires like a normal fucking human being, Loki had elected to wait, and wait, until Thor was so eaten up with desire that he could no longer bear it. And when that had proved not to work, Loki had decided on making him jealous. Peachy.

Thor was the physical embodiment of a glare as he sat between Volstagg and Hogun, distractedly talking with them both, as Loki and Fandral conversed with the girls opposite. Thor had been trying not to give Loki the satisfaction he wanted by tormenting him, but at this point it was a little late for that. Loki knew exactly what he was doing. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t spare so many moments to drop his empty cup and have to bend over to reach it, not only disaplying himself, but pushing his tailbone into Fandral’s crotch, making the poor guy’s eyes pop.

Thor didn’t really know either of the girls they were talking to, though they looked vaguely familiar. He’d probably seen them in the lunch hall or something. Their names were Amora and Valkyrie, they were cute sophomores, close to Loki’s age. He’d ask his friends about them later… 

“Oh!” Loki’s voice cut through his mind, and his head snapped to the side at once. He’d thought he’d been hurt, or angry, or...no. None of those. Loki had spilled what was left of Fandral’s cup down himself (and Fandral), leaving his shirt wet, and clinging to him. Thor gritted his teeth, feeling his cock twitch with interest at the sight, creating an uncomfortable - thankfully invisible - tent in his boxers. What Thor wouldn’t give to have his hands wrapped around himself right now, to reach out, to grab Loki in his grip and hold him, make him feel just as trapped as Thor felt in his affections. To hear his happy sounds and feel those arms close around him… the two of them slowly unravelling, tearing each other apart at the seams, in the glorious two-player game called love. And as Loki looked over, making eye contact and locking Thor in his gaze once again...Thor decided. That was just what he’d do.

** ~~~~~~ **

Across from Loki, Thor stood, gripping the edge of the table. Loki had to admit, it made him jump a little, although that may have been the ice-cold drink making it’s way down his chest. He prayed to God it would kindly evade his nipples.

“Loki. I wanna talk to you.”

Thor’s tone was hard, stone and slate. It was the tone that made the girls raise their brows confrontationally, and made Fandral’s gently hold on loki’s arms tighten. Perhaps he thought that would be reassuring. Loki opened his mouth to retort, to show Thor up. Embarrass him. He was having a huge amount of fun teasing his big brother, even if it did mean every shower he’d had for a week had been electively freezing. He was started to notice shrinkage…

“Loki.”  Thor was stood at Fandral’s feet, looking down at Loki, smooth features showing no sign of anger or annoyance. That was the problem. Loki couldn’t identify it, but somewhere in that expressionless face was something cold, domineering, authoritative… It was fucking hot is what it was.

Slowly, silkily, Loki stood from Fandral’s lap. The obvious authority thing that Thor was trying out inspired two things in Loki. One, was submission. The forcefulness, the demand for total obedience made Loki - for the first time in his life - willing to bend over backwards to please his big brother, which was a new and interesting sensation. But...it also made him want to play, to chafe under his oppressive ruler, to disobey just for fun. Loki wanted to see how much he could get away with before he was made to pay for it. That thought, again, sent a wave of heat down his spine, warming him and filling him with a zinging sensation, the familiar tingle of desire pooled in his consciousness, waiting to be satisfied. Oh, fuck. 

Before Loki had a chance to follow him properly, Thor had grabbed his wrist, holding it in an iron grip as he lead him down across the garden, into the house and upstairs, filled with the combined feeling of anticipation and something else. This was the feeling that comes from months, weeks, days of constant assault. Of underhanded winks, deliberate thigh touches underneath the dinner table, the squeeze of a hand under covers as they fell asleep. Thor had been pushed and pushed, and finally, he had given. And the wall Loki had chipped away, now lay cracked as what was behind it came to the surface. Loki’s body was singing with the thrill it gave him. 

Thor tore up the stairs, and when Loki couldn’t keep up, he scooped him up over his shoulder in a firemans lift. Loki made a couple of well-concealed irritated noises, but apart from that, there was no protest. None at all. All the available bedrooms appeared to be taken at first glance, and even after Thor one-handedly tried each handle, it became obvious that there was no space for their plans. Loki giggled quietly into Thor’s back.

“Nowhere to go?” 

Growling, Thor careered down the hall towards the closet, and shut the two of them in.

“Don’t count on it.” 

He knelt, letting Loki down so that he slumped against the wall. Thor move forward at once, pinning his wrists either side of his head and moving in for a hungry kiss that took the younger boy’s breath away. When Thor’s hands went to leave Loki’s wrists and Loki went to hold him through the kisses, a low growl vibrated through Thor’s chest and into Loki’s, making his eyes widen slightly, and his pulse quicken. 

“Stay there, boy.” 

Loki’s mouth parted, and Thor didn’t bother suppressing a groan of desire. 

“Yes..” T

hor opened his mouth impulsively, and barked out: 

“Call me ‘Sir’.” 

Loki’s eyes, which had fluttered closed, snapped open, and he released a pleasured noise of his own.

“Yes..Yes, sir..”

Their mouths returned to their previous game, soft lips pecking, biting, kissing along jawlines, necks, cheeks, anywhere they could reach. Thor removed his jersey with military precision, pulling off Loki’s shirt as he did so, shoving him back until his spine was flush with the wall, and a slightly irritated look on his beautiful face. At the flustered, lip-bitten sight of him, Thor groaned, reaching forward and taking him in his arms, pressing their foreheads together. 

“Now.. ” He demanded, though truly he felt like begging. He needed release, he needed this, needed Loki. And as long as Loki wanted him, then he’d damn sure get it. Loki nodded, a mutual understanding at once flashing between them. Brotherly empathy, for the need to slam themselves together until one of them passed out. Normal guy stuff. The smaller boy slunk to his knees, taking his brother out and jacking him slowly, maintaining soft eye contact. Thor groaned, thrusting up into the contact this gave him, twisting fingers in Loki’s hair to guide his head down to his member. Loki opened his mouth to retort, to say something scathing, but the words never got to his lips. Thor’s hand twisted in his hair, bending his head back. 

“Suck me or get a gag.”

He growled, and Loki licked his lips, a zing of arousal letting out a small, muted mewl.

“Yes...sir.” 

The moment Loki’s mouth enveloped Thor’s dick, it felt like an electric shock, an explosion, every single cliche even remotely linked to heightened sensation was perfect. He nearly blew his load within seconds, but restrained the urge. He’d been waiting what felt like a lifetime to feel this...he was gonna enjoy what patience had granted him. Loki ran his mouth down and up, down and up, moaning quietly around Thor’s length, and making the football player moan. 

Loki chuckled around him, somehow managing not to choke, and hollowed out his cheeks, applying pressure. Thor mumbled old Norse words he couldn’t remember learning, and let his head roll back, transcending all conscious realm of sensation and entering a world that was built of pleasure. This...this was all he wanted, all he could ever ask for. 

“Loki…”

“Oh, hell no.” Loki’s mouth came off with a pop, startling Thor, and was sitting up, unbuckling his pants.

“You are not gonna sit there and let me blow you, do you know how crazy you make me?! do you really think I was just gonna suck you and just walk away, that I’m actually capable of doing that?” He snapped, all pink cheeks and cherry-bitten lips. Thor was almost alarmed. 

“I..uh..”

“Forget about it.” Loki straddled him, lower half bare, and stripped Thor in much the same way. He lifted his head, caught his labret between his teeth, and said the sexiest thing Thor had ever heard him say.

“Let me ride you?” Thor felt a low moan resonate from deep within his throat, and leaned in, pulling his little brother’s face forwards to crush his lips against his own, tasting his desire and want, his ferocious need for pleasure, for relief. For love. All of which Thor planned to provide. He pushed Loki back, drawing his legs obscenely open. Loki looked up, panting with confusion. 

“But..I thought..”

“I fully plan to let you ride my dick, baby, but that’s not gonna feel good without preparation.”

Loki furrowed his brow, rutting forward for Thor’s touch. 

“I’ll be fine..” Thor’s hands on his thighs holding him still quickly halted his attempts.

“You’ve really never done this before, have you?” He mocked, sliding a hand into Loki’s pocket for vaseline, and sliding his fingers into the pot. Loki huffed indignantly, hooking his hands around the back of his knees, spreading himself wide for display, making his senior flush. 

“And I suppose you have?”

“Didn’t say that…” 

Oh, but Sports Camp had been so much more fun after the discovery of hurried handjobs during shower time. 

“Just...relax. This is gonna take some preparation. The best thing to do is lay back and let me take care of you. If you feel any pain, let me know.” 

Loki made a face, squirming already. He behaved in a similar fashion throughout Thor’s preparations, huffing irritably as he massaged the lube around his entrance, and making indignant little noises as Thor’s fingers opened him up - gently and teasingly loosening the hole for use. Only when two fingers breached him did the younger boy fall silent, noises freezing on his tongue. 

“..Yes.” He whimpered, going happily lax and almost dazed with the gentle pleasure. Thor smiled. It had taken roughly ten minutes to satisfactorily prepare his brother, now he was ready for the taking. Eager and fidgeting and blushing rose-pink...perfect. Loki, as ever, was perfect. And if Thor thought the noises Loki made as he bucked around intrusively lovely fingers were perfect, then nothing would prepare him for the sound his brother as he seated himself properly inside his desperate entrance. It was everything Thor had sought, everything he’d spent long needy nights begging for, the images that danced in his head every time he (accidentally) walked in on naked Loki showering or pressed a kiss to his head during a rare embrace. This...was love. 

The very nectar of humanity, and Thor was taking it by the shot.

“Th-Th-THOR!” Loki moaned, gasping with the overstimulation of it all as Thor began to pound him, jacking him off as he shoved in and out, strong muscles shifting beneath his skin as he fucked Loki raw. 

“Quiet…” Thor rumbled, clamping a hand over his beautiful mouth to stifle his sounds, before anyone heard Loki’s distinctive voice screaming his big brother’s name, mad with desire and lust. Loki let out a string of irritated sounds, then continued with the repetitive song of moans, sighs, sobbing cries of desperate pleasure, digging nails into Thor’s shoulders. Thor groaned deep in his throat, spasming around the deep, amazing, cloying warmth that was his love. His true love. And with that thought in mind, Thor made a guttural cry and climaxed finally, thrusting every last drop of himself into Loki.

With the release of his orgasm and the depth of his joy, came a bout of uncontrollable feelings, words and the need to expel them physically; to express his love right then, right there. He opened his mouth and opened his heart. 

“...I love you, Loki. Be mine. I know it’s not right and we’ll have to hide it from dad, but I don’t want to go to college. I don’t want to spend a day of my life away from you, and every time I think of going away...I can’t do it. I won’t. Come with me, use our college funds to get a shitty one bedroom somewhere in the city, we’ll get crappy jobs and eat takeout every night and hold each other in the winter to keep warm, and...” 

Thor extended his hand, and Loki immediately threaded pale fingers through his.

“Run away with me”

Loki’s mouth quirked up. “...Two bedroom apartment.” 

And that was that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I FUCKING HOPE YOU LIKED IT BECAUSE IT TOOK ME SO LONG TO FUCKING WRITE DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND JESUS


	9. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And, without further ado, the final chapter.

Thor reclined back in his favourite armchair, the one where the cover was shiny and thin, having bore his ass for God knew how many years. They’d even banged on it a couple times...it had been amazingly comfortable.

Jane soon waddled over to invade his space, he grudgingly moved to let her perch on the armrest, though due to her heavily pregnant state she should rightly have the entire chair.

He stood, giving it to her.

“How’re the girls?” He grinned as she seated herself, running a hand over her rounded belly, inside which his twin daughters wriggled and kicked. It had taken less than a moment and thousands of dollars to convince Sif’s wife to agree to be a surrogate mother to his and Loki’s children, and even after their first born, Thor never got used to seeing her swell with his babies.

Jane smiled a little, joining his hand with her own.

“Fussy. Victoria is to the left, Hermione on the right. They both want all the space.”

She told him, leaning back to get comfortable.

“I look forward to the family road trips.” Thor smiled. He couldn’t wait to meet them.

“DADDY”

Little Fabian squealed, running across the room at high speeds, only to be scooped up into the welcome arms of his father. Loki followed, arms out and hands ready to tickle.

“Come back here, you little escapee!” He called, laughing heartily, joining Thor as he held their son. The little boy was all pink cheeks and bright blue eyes, his distinctly orange hair shining bright in the glow of the open log fire. It was Christmas Eve, fifteen years after Thor Odinson and Loki Jotunheim had decided on their future together, in the bathroom at a college party. Years of no money and laughter and happiness ensued, including community college diplomas, low-paying jobs, Masters degrees and shitty apartments. They’d gotten by, and more than that. They’d been happy enough that they both found themselves experiencing jaw ache from smiling, and by the time they’d managed to pay off a mortgage, arrangements had been made for their first child to come into the world.

Now Fabian was two, and the twin girls were five months in Jane’s belly...and neither of them remembered ever being so content.

“You run just as fast as daddy.”

Thor praised him, bouncing the happy little boy. Fabian giggled, wrapping his arms around his neck.

“Did I ever tell you I wanted to be a professional football player, before I met your dada?”

“Only every other day, love.”

Loki answered, an undertone of laughter in his lovely voice. Thor hushed his snarky mouth with a kiss, and hands with red-painted nails snatched the child.

“Auntie Darcy remembers.” Darcy grinned, flipping Fabian onto his back to blow raspberries on his tummy. The baby shrieked, cuddling at her. Auntie Darcy as as much part of the family as Sif and Jane, visited every couple months with her husband, Ian. Thor had never seen a guy so happy to be whipped. That was, until he’d looked last in the mirror.

“FFFBBALLLL” Fabian yelled, smiling broadly as Sif walked over to take his hand. She’d been the one to bear Fabian, but you couldn’t tell now she was back in her black minidresses. She crossed the room, going to rub her wife’s belly and offer her non-alcoholic eggnog. Jane threw it in a nearby plant pot, but the thought was there.

“Yes, football.” Loki validated his son, leaning into Thor and kissing his cheek. Time had blessed him with crows feet, and he’d filled out when he’d hit twenty-five, losing his thinness and becoming a man, not a boy. Now a father.

“We’re all very happy daddy didn’t choose that route. It would have taken him towards a profitable career...and away from me.”

“Which is not somewhere daddy wants to go.”

Thor smiled, kissing him long and hard. Their family….Sif, Jane, Darcy, Ian, Fabian, Hermione, Victoria...and Loki.

“Never.” Loki agreed, and snuggled into the loving embrace of Thor, his more or less husband. An embrace he never planned to leave, at least not any time soon. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you. For everything.


End file.
